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Neil Carruthers

Neil Carruthers

Neil is the Digital Media Co-ordinator of Lifetime Planning.

Posted by on in Christmas

So, the season is upon us. Your office Christmas party is nearing. A chance for you and your colleagues to go out and enjoy the festive spirit(s). Do the following 10 stages sound familiar to you?

  1. Attempt to arrive late, so you’re not first one there – end up being the first one. Stand at the bar alone for a good 15 minutes wondering if you’re in the right meeting place.

  2. Somehow end up last to the table at the restaurant, with the only seat left being next to Nigel from Accounts. Exhaust all small talk with him. Scroll through your phone until your starter arrives.

  3. Enjoy a few glasses of the free wine at the table. Slur your words slightly, try to laugh it off – plead you’re not drunk.

  4. Awkwardly pose for photos that you’re not quite ready to be in. Pray that you don’t get tagged on Facebook.

  5. The shy admin assistant gets smashed on Apple Sourz, loses their bank card, starts crying and gets sent home in a taxi at 8.

  6. You all drunkenly agree you should be doing more outside of work with each other, and agree to do something every Friday in January. You all quietly forget/don’t bother mentioning it in January.

  7. Jump around with Nigel from Accounts to Slade’s Merry Christmas Everybody, fall into a table, spill drinks EVERYWHERE. Get a disappointed shake of the head from your HR manager.

  8. Get yourself into a dance off. Attempt the “worm”. Struggle to get back on your feet.

  9. Lose your jacket ticket for the cloakroom. Wrap yourself in tinsel “this’ll keep me warm”. Be stripped of it on the way out by the bouncers.

  10. Grab a taxi with a couple colleagues that live in the same area. Have a good snoop of the outside of their house from the taxi. Question yourself whether you actually DO live in the same area as them. End up paying £100+ to get home.

Let us know your office Christmas party mishaps. Tweet us @lifetimep or comment below.

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